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* Jewel has betrayed signs of nervousness all afternoon and into the evening. Despite doing warm-ups that morning, she's run through her exercise routine at least twice more since returning home. She ate mechanically, giving every appearance of hunger but very little interest in eating. * Jewel now sits in a comfortable chair, staring at an open book but not turning pages. * Jewel finally puts the book down with a frustrated sigh and scrubs her face. "Bastian?" Her voice is tentative. * Angel has been mildly preoccupied this evening, sorting, sharpening, and cleaning his various hidden nasties. He looks up from the latest batch. "My lady?" <Jewel> I... I need to talk to you. ::she gets up and comes over to sit by where he's working, looking idly at the assortment of weaponry. She looks up at him, struck by a sudden idea:: Bastian, may I have your knife for a moment? <Angel> ::raises an eyebrow:: You keep confusing him, you know. One of these days, he's going to decide he's *permanently* yours. ::reaches to his sheath and draws the blade, handing it to her pommel first:: <Jewel> ::bites her lip and accepts the blade. She inspects the edge, and settles her grip so that the back of the blade parallels her forearm in a "ready" position. Taking a settling breath and closing her eyes, she opens her mind to the blade's recent history.:: <Angel> ::the blade seems to twitch in her hand, just a little, then gives over a rush of imagery - the quick grab, then the blade, thrust through the fleshy back, jerked sideways to cut the spine:: <Jewel> ::eyes still closed, her hand tracks the blade's movement unconsciously, flinching a little as the spine is cut. She flutters her eyes open again, taking several clearing breaths before handing the knife back, hilt-first.:: * Angel tests the edge briefly, then runs a finger along the flat of the blade before replacing it into its sheath. "And?" <Jewel> I'm sorry. I... needed to see. ::she shifts her seat, twitching a wrinkle out of her skirts:: I... ::she stops and shakes her head:: No, no good. ::she stands and comes around the table to sit at his feet, one arm around a leg, her head on his knee. She sighs.:: I've... been worried about us. * Angel puts his latest nasty down and pushes his chair back slightly. "How so?" <Jewel> I've... ::her voice falters:: I've been afraid that I've been letting you down. ::her grip on his leg tightens a little:: I... haven't been a good partner to you lately. <Angel> ::blinks, then peers at her:: Want to run that by me again in Common? * Jewel sighs and looks up at him, her eyes troubled. "You're hurting, love. I know you are. And I've been... just sitting here, hoping it would heal, letting you muddle through on your own, letting you..." She swallows hard. * Angel looks aside, his jaw tightening. "I told you... and Dawn. It's mending." <Jewel> ::sharply:: It is *not.* But it's not Dawn's responsibility to do something about it... it's mine. And... ::sighs:: ...I've been shirking it. <Angel> ::his teeth grind together a moment:: Leave it alone, Jewel. <Jewel> ::hotly:: I will *not*. Do you think I love you so little? You've been the steel in my spine and the strength of my arms for all the time I've known you. Well, now it's my turn. I am not your child, I am not your employee. I am your *wife,* Bastian Hooke, and it's time I started acting like it. * Angel is on his feet in an instant, the chair hitting the wall on the other side of the room scant seconds later. "I said *NO*!" His eyes are blazing, but the rest of his face is chill with anger, perhaps the first time that anger has been directed at Jewel. <Jewel> ::her heart quails at the look in his eyes, but she grits her teeth and gets to her feet as well, face to face, looking him right in the eye:: I am not so weak as you think me. Nor are *you.* ::she touches his mind, offering him a moment of memory-- himself, determined to save Andrial's life, slaying the guard:: You will *not* hide from me any longer, love. <Angel> ::without warning, Angel's hand snakes out and he forcefully backhands her across the face:: Bitch. How *dare* you... ::he spins away from her, slamming one hand into the wall, puffing plaster everywhere:: * Jewel falls to the ground with a gasp, moving with the blow as Dusk's dedicated hours of sparring kick in instinctively. She lies there for a moment, touching her face gingerly to ascertain the damage before getting slowly to her feet again. * Angel punches the wall. And again. His rage is so great that he releases a scream of almost inhuman hatred. <Jewel> I dare because I *love* you. And I will *not* watch you lock yourself away in there from *me.* ::quieter:: I went to Andrial today. * Jewel closes her eyes against her pain and moves up behind him swiftly, wrapping her arms around his from behind and clinging tightly. <Angel> ::his jaw clenched, his words come out harsh and short:: What did you do. <Jewel> I saw her memories. <Jewel> I felt... what you did. <Angel> ::whatever strength and rage was sustaining him burns out and without warning, he slides to the floor:: No. * Jewel follows him down, arms still wrapped around him, her uninjured cheek pressed to his back. "You would have spared me that, love, but I couldn't spare myself. Not with what it was doing to you... to *both* of us. We're one, you and I, never forget that." <Angel> ::without looking at her:: Why would you do that? How... ::he begins shaking badly and after a moment, Jewel realizes that he is weeping:: <Jewel> ::gently:: Because it was taking you away from me. You *weren't* healing, and I was too afraid to try to help. I was jealous of Andrial, and frightened of causing you more pain, and... no more. I *know*, love. And it doesn't change how I feel about you... it just means you don't have to bear this alone anymore. <Angel> ::breathing slowly as if he's forcing himself to remember how to breathe at all:: You betrayed me. * Jewel jerks as if he'd slapped her again, but doesn't let go. "I kept my marriage vow to you." <Angel> ::he turns, once again serpent-quick, gripping her arms with both hands:: You *lied*. To me. ::he shakes her roughly:: <Jewel> ::her eyes sad, not resisting:: As you did, to me. You didn't keep me out to protect me, love. You did it because you *feared* me. I couldn't bear that, I couldn't! <Angel> ::softly, his hands loosening on her arms:: What you couldn't bear... <Jewel> ::takes advantage of his looser grip to embrace him again:: No more secrets between us, no more lies. We are partners, you and I. ::draws back to look in his eyes:: What you cannot bear, I must. And that way, they break *neither* of us. ::fiercely:: You have *nothing* you need to prove, to *anyone.* * Angel shudders all over, barely meeting Jewel's eyes before collapsing, burying his face against her stomach, sobbing with anguish. * Jewel wraps her arms around him, rubbing his back. Tentatively, she reaches out to him with her thoughts, offering a soothing touch. * Angel cries himself out, then lays there for a while, head in Jewel's lap, drawing hitching breaths. <Jewel> She strokes his hair softly, murmuring gentle inanities until he starts to calm, her presence in his head a firm, calm touch. {I trusted your good opinion of me, once, when I was no longer sure of myself. Please, love... trust me now. I love you as no other.} * Angel sits up slowly, then looks at her. His eyes dim somewhat as he looks at her face where her lip is already swelling, and at the purpling marks on her arms. "Damn. I hit you." * Jewel smiles a little, wincing a bit as her lip pulls. "So you did. You're already forgiven." She leans forward and kisses his lips gently. <Angel> ::in a tentative voice:: Catreenia? How can you still... love me? <Jewel> ::eyes widening slightly:: How could I *not*? You're still the bravest, strongest, kindest... ::blushes slightly:: gods-be-damned *sexiest* man I've ever met, and it's a constant wonder to me that you're still mine. But above everything else... ::shrugs a shoulder, and says simply:: You're *you.* <Jewel> None of the rest matters to me... just that you're you. ::kisses him again:: * Angel sighs and pulls her into his arms. "Lucky me." <Jewel> ::her lips curling into a grin, wincing slightly again:: No, love. Lucky *me.* |
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