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* Glossaria sits, for a change, in the reception room of the Tower, reading. * Meghan walks up to the Tower stopping just before the door. She is wearing a dark blue dress and has the silver circlet on her head. She is holding a book in hands which are trembling slightly. She takes a deep breath and steps to the door knocking lightly. * Glossaria looks up at the sound of a deep, hollow boom, which is the Tower's way (today at least) of announcing a caller. A small, blue flame bobs into being, but Gloss closes her book and waves a hand. "Don't bother, I'll get it." * Meghan stands at the door taking slow deep breaths. * Glossaria skips lightly down the steps to the front door, and opens it. "Welcome to-- oh. Hello, Meghan." <Glossaria> ::pausing a moment, frowning:: Val is at class right now. * Meghan looks up at Gloss and smiles "Hello Glossaria," she shakes her head. "I came to see you, not Val." <Glossaria> ::blinks, and waits politely, still standing in the door:: Yes? * Meghan lightly bites at her bottom lip and continues. "I was hoping to talk, if you are not to busy?" <Glossaria> ::looking over her shoulder reluctantly, and down at her book:: I have some time to talk, yes. Have you had dinner? Would you prefer to go somewhere? <Meghan> We can stay here. ::she nods:: I did just finish dinner a bit ago thank you. * Glossaria steps back from the door and wordlessly invites Meghan inside with a gesture. "Stay in the same room as I am. I can only issue limited invitations in Zoya's absence." * Meghan nods and steps into the Tower. * Glossaria leads Meghan up two flights of stairs and around a hairpin corner to the parlor. * Meghan follows the girl closely. * Glossaria offers Meghan a choice of comfy chairs in the wood-panelled, book-lined room. "Please. Have a seat. Would you like something to drink?" * Meghan sits and shakes her head "No, but thanks." She holds the book out to Gloss. "I brought this back for you. I was allowed one thing to bring back from the library where we were and I thought you might like to add it to the Tower's collection" * Glossaria tilts her head and accepts the volume, brushing her fingers over the cover and lifting it to her nose before opening it and turning to the title page. "It's old... and remarkably well-preserved." * Meghan nods. <Glossaria> ::examining the title page:: "Healing and Empathy, by Lorellan Silveril." ::frowning thoughtfully as she traces a finger over the opening capital. The text is Common, but the calligraphy is pre-Drannor Elvish. This is quite unusual. Thank you, this will be a benefit to the Tower collection. * Glossaria smiles. * Meghan smiles back. "I'm glad." <Glossaria> ::indicates the circlet with a hand:: Your quest was successful? * Meghan nods, reaching to touch it lightly. "It was. Moreso a quest of me growing as a person. I couldn't have done it without Kevil and Michelle, though. I think we all came away having learned a little something." * Glossaria smiles more openly, leaning back in her chair. "I'm glad to hear that, Meghan. Was the journey pleasant, then?" <Meghan> ::nods:: Most of it was, yes. There were a few unexpected things, but all and all ::she pauses:: well, it could have been a lot worse. <Glossaria> ::nods:: Any journey is fraught with the unexpected. ::grins:: Or so I hear. My own experience being rather limited in that respect. <Meghan> ::nods:: Well, I'm sure that you will get your chance. You have many years left ahead of you ::she smiles softly:: and something tells me you would not let yourself go your whole life and never have a good quest. <Glossaria> ::smiles:: In Marsember... and especially in the Hall... I find adventure comes to me. But I'm sure I'll have my opportunity... especially with a pyrokinetic for a husband. * Meghan nods to her. <Meghan> Well I do have something specific I came here to talk to you about. I assume Vallel told you what happened just before I left. * Glossaria loses her smile. "Yes." * Meghan looks down for a moment and then back up at Gloss. "I have been going over and over in my head what I could tell you to try and make you understand why I did what I did. And when it comes down to it there is nothing I can tell you that will make you understand. But I would like to try and show you," she pauses looking closely at Gloss, "if you would be willing." <Glossaria> ::cocking her head to one side, slowly, her eyes guarded:: Explain, please. <Meghan> I just want to show you how I felt when I kissed Vallel, but moreso how I felt after i did. <Glossaria> Meghan... ::shaking her head and sighing:: I can understand what your feelings must have been. But... how you felt does not excuse what you *did,* and what you tried to do. You're a rational human being, Meghan. Didn't you understand how horribly fragile Vallel was at that point? How *guilty* he must have felt? And you-- you *ignored* that! You took advantage of the man I love when he was in pain, and you think you can somehow *excuse* that? * Meghan looks quickly away from Gloss, nodding to her at the same time. She is silent for a moment and then looks back to Gloss; her face is filled with pain. <Meghan> Glossaria, I would never try to excuse what I did. I did not come to justify what I did either. I just want you to understand that in that moment I was... ::she pauses again:: I love him so much, Gloss. All I could think about was doing something, anything to help him. It was so strong in that moment-- I was so filled with what I could do to try to help him-- that I was not thinking of him at all... <Meghan> ::she is visibly shaking at this point:: Then, it was to late. It all came rushing to me, memories of my own mind being taken over and how I felt afterwards. ::she looks down a few tears slipping down her cheeks:: <Meghan> ::softly:: I talked to him when I got back. Told him how sorry I was. I needed to tell you, too. Glossaria, I never meant to hurt you. <Glossaria> ::impassively, not responding to Meghan's emotion at all:: So, you are sorry. You couldn't control yourself, and so you thoughtlessly hurt both one you claimed to love and one you claimed as a friend. ::she pauses for a moment, head bowed:: Very well, I can accept that. And... have you better control of yourself now? <Meghan> ::softly:: I believe so, yes. * Glossaria nods again. * Meghan glances over to Gloss. <Glossaria> Meghan... I understand that you have been attempting to get in touch with your emotions. As have I. ::she cocks her head to one side, birdlike:: Will you allow me to offer you some advice? * Meghan nods. <Glossaria> ::takes a deep breath, and lets it out:: I know that I'm young. And I know that I have difficulty... dealing with emotions at times. I feel them, but... they're... new. Perhaps I don't have the understanding of a natural-born human, but I believe my detachment provides me with some perspective. <Glossaria> Meghan, I think you feel very deeply. Not only your emotions, but others'... I imagine it can be quite confusing. ::looks rueful:: My own can be confusing enough, I know. I believe it is not *emotion* you need to get in touch with, but reason. Emotions... they push. Reason controls, contains. You understand? * Meghan nods again "It's not easy, but I am beginning to better understand." <Glossaria> ::dips her head, once:: Good. And I have one more thing for you.... * Glossaria rises, and walks to the corner of the room, her finger brushing the spines of several books before she selects one and opens it. * Meghan watches her. <Glossaria> ::finding a page, and looking up for a moment:: I believe this book comes from your world... Master Marten helped me with the language. It appears to be a fragment of a larger work, but I'm not certain if it's a work of philosophy, or religion, or simply a form of poetry. * Meghan nods lightly, listening. <Glossaria> ::clears her throat, finding the quotation she wants with a finger:: Here... "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs... <Glossaria> ::continuing:: "Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices in the truth. It always protects, it always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love..." ::Gloss closes the book, looking Meghan in the eye:: "...never fails." * Meghan returns her gaze. She is silent for a moment and then whispers, "I love him, Gloss." <Glossaria> ::reshelves the book, her finger lingering on the spine a moment more before she turns:: Do you, Meghan? Or do you love the way he makes you feel? <Meghan> ::shakes her head:: It's more than that. When I left I thought it was the way he made me feel. But now I know it's so much more than that. <Glossaria> ::softly:: If you knew your love was tearing him apart... could you give him up? If he told you he wanted no more than friendship from you, for the rest of your lives-- could you be satisfied? Could you cope without *his* love? * Meghan looks away and for a moment is silent. She then looks back to Gloss "I could. It's hard for me to say that now because, in this moment, it is hard for me to imagine it. But honestly, how can I not think that? He is going to marry you and be your husband. I have to be satisfied with his friendship. Somehow, I will be." <Glossaria> ::nods softly and puts her hand on Meghan's shoulder:: Then, perhaps... just perhaps... that is love. And for that... ::she bites her lip:: I think... the word for this feeling is "pity." I *am* sorry, Meghan. * Meghan winces slightly and nods. After a moment she stands. "I guess I should go." <Glossaria> ::nods and starts for the hallway, pausing:: Meghan... ::shakes her head:: I won't offer you platitudes. Some believe that there is someone in the world for everyone. There may be someone out there for you, somewhere... there may not. Either way... you will survive. And if you live up to even a fraction of your gift's potential, I believe you could be very, very happy. * Meghan nods to her. "I don't know if this is the right time or place to tell you this, but I am going to. Simply because I don't want to keep it from you and I asked Vallel not to tell you. I am pregnant. The baby is from the man who worked for the mage who abducted me. I have decided to keep it." <Glossaria> ::looks startled:: Keep it? But... ::frowning:: You do know that the midwives here can... take care of unwanted pregnancies? <Meghan> ::nods:: I know. I just can't bring myself to... ::she looks at Gloss:: It's part of me, too. Somehow, it will work out. <Glossaria> ::nods:: If you're sure. ::taking Meghan's hands and kissing her lightly on each cheek:: Then... congratulations. I wish you well. Both of you. <Meghan> ::smiles softly:: Thank you. * Meghan stops in the doorway to the Tower and turns to Gloss. "Michelle and I were talking the other day. I was telling her about Vallel and how I felt. She told me I should talk to you about it. About the possibility of a circle. I promised her I would; I don't know if it is something you or Vallel would even consider. Especially now, but I want you to know I would." <Glossaria> A circ--? ::blinking:: Perhaps... before Charoli, I had considered it myself, briefly. But now... ::shakes her head:: No. I'm sorry. * Meghan nods to her. "I understand." <Glossaria> ::a hint of a smile touches her lips:: And as much as two women might appeal to an adolescent male... I'm not certain Vallel would... be comfortable in a non-traditional arrangement. * Meghan nods again. "I'm sure you are right. I promised Michelle I would mention it, so I did." She smiles a strained smile and steps out into the evening. "Have a nice night, Glossaria" <Glossaria> Good night, Meghan. I'm... I'm glad you came. * Meghan nods and smiles once more before walking off into the twilight. |
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