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At some point during the next week, Gloss will show up, rather breathlessly, at what passes for Xarroch's door (at least, the locus of his little semi-stabilized pocket of Chaos). Her hair changes lengths and colors every ten minutes like clockwork, but otherwise she appears as normal.... "Hello, Xarroch! Is Meghan here?" Gloss barely pauses before she continues in a rush: "I hope not, because I was hoping I could talk to you... alone." Meghan indeed is not in, and Xarroch invites Gloss in. Gloss glances around at the shifting contents of the room, but doesn't appear to spend much of her attention on them. Instead, she looks up at Xarroch, shifting from foot to foot with nervous energy. "You told me at the Hall that... well, that you might be willing to help me." She looks down and studies the floor for a moment as it slides from bare earth to transparency to a normal-looking wood floor with a throw rug. "I told you about how Vallel and I were having... troubles, and how we... thought it best that we might see other people for a little while, have other experiences." She blushes a little. "As you know, I've read a great deal on the topic, but my personal experience is not very... wide. Part of the reason Vallel and I agreed to this trial year was so we could... get more experience, if we wanted to." Xarroch nods and allows Glossaria to continue, waiting curiously. The floor shifts to a lush carpet strewn with silk pillows for a moment, and melts back to the throw rug as she looks up at Xarroch again, her eyes alight. "Well... you're an 'experience' I'd really like to have, if you'd have me. I've thought about... us... on and off before, wondered, but I was so shy, and... Xarroch, I don't know what's come over me lately, but I haven't been able to stop thinking of you since the Hall... thinking what it might be like, to..." She looks down for a moment, and looks up again, meeting his eyes more boldly, "...to breed with you." Xarroch raises an eyebrow and opens his eyes slightly wider, but otherwise remains impassive. She studies his face for a moment, watching his reaction. "I don't ask for commitment, just... if you'd grant me just one night with you, Xarroch, let me get this need, this overwhelming desire out of my head, I'd be eternally grateful." She steps closer to him, and, tentatively, lifts her hand and places it on his chest, shivering a little and drawing in a quick breath as she touches him, a look of intense longing passing over her features. "Please, Xarroch, as a friend, I need your help. I need to know. Would you do this for me?" She lays her cheek over her hand. "Would you consent to be my demon lover? Would you..." Here she makes a screaming, gargling yip, a word in the demon tongue most often used by succubi, that amounts to a proposition for a one-night stand. Xarroch rests a taloned hand on Glossaria's shoulder gently and takes a deep breath, pausing. "I have not forgotten how... unique you are. That you have used the magic of my kind... and the things you manage to find in your research." He chuckles low and rumbling, and gently but firmly disengages Glossaria and sits her down in a chair that takes the place of the rug. The chair's style and shape change only slightly and settle into another that forms up from the floor. Xarroch sits, and looks at Glossaria with a penetrating look. "You are no succubus, girl..." Gloss drops her head, looking a little chagrined. He grins and chuckles a little. "Do not take that the wrong way, I see it more as a compliment than an insult. Rather limited creatures, I always thought. But you are not." Xarroch stretches out his wings and resettles in the chair. Gloss looks back up at him, hopefully. Xarroch tries to smile reassuringly... at least as reassuring as a mouth full of sharp teeth on a large and fierce looking demon can be. "I have seen enough of you and our other friends to know that I do not understand how your kinds do handle things of this nature, but I *do* know that this is not something so simple for you that playing succubus to me will solve it or make you feel better. How would this make you feel less miserable about the boy, Vallel, and whatever relationship you were making with him?" "I... I don't..." A fleeting look of confusion passes over Gloss's face and is gone again. Her response, when it finally comes, sounds very dry and rational, untinged by the emotion that colored her voice when she made her plea to Xarroch before. "Vallel and I both have little experience with sex, except with each other. Vallel stated his belief that the sex, and the bond of having been each other's 'first time,' was perhaps all that kept us together. If I gain wider sexual experience and *still* love Vallel, not only will I have greater knowledge to add to my own skill base, but I will also have disproved his theory that sex was the sole basis of our relationship." She cocks her head to one side, thinking, and adds, "Perhaps, I will also be able to bring a more refined skill to our partnering, and increase my value to Vallel as a mate." She looks faintly puzzled for a moment, and then nods, as if to affirm what she just said. Xarroch listens and watches Glossaria's expression with interest, noting the little changes, then sighs a little and looks away for a moment. "I will be quite happy to talk with you of these feelings and problems, to help you think about what you truly want, and should do. And I will ultimately help you with what whatever seems best for you. I... am not good at comforting. I do not coddle," he looks at Glossaria sternly for a moment, "...and I do not welcome being used." Xarroch relaxes a little. "I do not believe that you would mean to, but you have seemed too confused for me to be sure you truly know what is best." Gloss has the grace to look slightly ashamed. "I confess... I hadn't thought of it that way." Her brow wrinkles, and she looks faintly distressed. "I thought I had thought it all through... it was such a... reasonable solution, and both of us would come away from this with a new experience, and the pleasure of it...." She frowns, and shakes her head as if to clear it. "It all made sense, before I came here...." "As I had said, I do not believe that you would intend to try to use me, for any purpose." Xarroch shakes his head a bit, and notes Glossaria's growing uncertainty. "So. Talk to me of your desire, then. Tell me of the boy and what happened. And if it goes that far, and if it seems right, then we can talk of sex, and how to try to handle that." A small smile plays over his face. "I am not at all opposed to the idea... I admit to some curiosity myself. But I will not hurt a friend to satisfy it." Xarroch nods encouragingly to Glossaria to talk, and conjures a small table with water beside her. <Xarroch> ::another small table grows up from the floor beside Xarroch, with a mug on it.. Xarroch picks up the mug and takes a sip, waiting patiently for Glossaria to speak::<Glossaria> ::turning her hands over, studying them intently as if fascinated with them:: I have so much to learn... I feel like I have so much to catch up on. ::looking up at Xarroch, a small crease between her brows:: Human society is very complex, and the way humans interact... ::she shakes her head:: I thought if I could understand that, I could strike at the heart of understanding the species.... <Xarroch> ::grins in sympathy:: Now that much confusion I certainly share with you. <Xarroch> I have not been as immersed as you... nor had a form so constantly human, so I doubt I have as much understanding as you have gained. ::shakes head:: Nor, it seem, as much of the confusion you have gained from it. <Glossaria> I... ::she shakes her head again:: I was confused... I think. But I am no longer. I had lost touch with my desire to explore this amazing world. As a sage, expanding my knowledge is very important to me... *very* important. ::looking earnestly at Xarroch:: I don't intend any insult to you, Xarroch, but surely you understand how... unique you are. <Xarroch> ::grins:: No more so than yourself. <Glossaria> ::blushing a little, gracefully:: Well... that aside. There are no romantic stories about worm girls. ::looking at him, her eyes glinting with a touch of the passion she betrayed earlier:: But stories of demon lovers abound... extending far back in time, and widely across the literature of many societies. ::gazing at him raptly:: <Xarroch> I do not take it as insult. ::pauses a moment:: Being unique has made me the demon I am today, and I would not trade that, nor do I think it could be much improved if I could choose how to do so. <Xarroch> Do they? <Xarroch> ::snorts a little:: Humans! In general, human relations with demons, sexual or otherwise, tend to turn out poorly for the humans. But you make it sounds as if these stories are appealing things. <Glossaria> ::nodding:: They do. Even if it has only happened a few times in actuality, the very concept strikes at the dark romanticism of the human heart... the danger, the forbidden aspect, appears only to add to the appeal. <Xarroch> ::nods a little sadly:: A path to corruption... that much I have known of. ::looks Glossaria in the eyes:: You have no idea how many human souls have been drawn to the Abyss for falling into that dark temptation... I think I begin to understand a bit more of how it happens now... <Xarroch> ::smiles just a little:: And you know I will not drag your soul screaming into damnation, yes? Is this the appeal you see... having the chance to explore the dark desires of your now human heart without the danger? <Glossaria> I only understand... *parts* of it, but the combination of sex and danger-- or the simulation of danger-- appears to be very...::thinks for a moment:: ...compelling to humans. Even speaking to you about it, I think I understand more... my heart rate is accelerated, my breathing has deepened, and I feel slightly flushed. * Glossaria nods. <Xarroch> And is this how you felt with your boy? Vallel? <Glossaria> Vallel... ::confusion passes over her face again, as if she momentarily couldn't place the name:: Yes, these are all early signs of physical arousal. <Xarroch> ::nods a little:: But there was more, was there not? <Glossaria> ::blinking for a moment, and sounding somewhat reluctant when she speaks:: There... there was an emotional involvement in that relationship as well, yes. ::looking up at Xarroch with a small frown:: Are you saying that you think I should have an emotional relationship with you, first? <Glossaria> ::she shakes her head:: I don't believe I'm very good at emotional relationships. And... ::frowning again, rubbing her forehead, and speaking more easily:: I think I must have imagined that other one. Vallel only wanted me for sex, after all. <Xarroch> ::shakes his head:: Not necessarily. I understand some things about just filling one's needs, simply to fill them... ::pauses a moment:: I did once live that way. <Xarroch> Imagined it? ::shakes his head:: No. <Xarroch> I may not *understand* humans and their behaviors, but perhaps that makes me more able to see things. You were very upset a few days ago, and it was genuine. When the boy visited, he was quite distressed at the idea of not only losing you to assassins, but at the very thought of breeding with another attractive human instead of you. <Glossaria> ::frowning:: The thought of... but... ::looking puzzled:: he said we should... see other people. ::gesturing to Xarroch:: You're other people. <Glossaria> ::running her finger over the bridge of her nose in a pensive gesture:: He... he was angry at me when I wouldn't have sex with him, when he was injured. He was very eager to leave and have sex with someone else, instead, since I.... ::shaking her head as if to clear it:: <Xarroch> ::frowns a little and raises an eyebrow in inquiry:: Explain. What happened? * Glossaria draws her brows together, leaning forward in her chair a little as she thinks. <Glossaria> "There was the Mayor's party... the excitement... Vallel was injured, and Michelle and I healed him... but that spell is not an instant cure, I knew the skin would still be very thin and tender. And I was... worried about him? ::she sounds faintly puzzled:: <Xarroch> ::smiles just a little and speaks softly:: It would make sense for you to be concerned for someone you cared for... <Glossaria> ::Gloss nods, somewhat automatically:: He was tired... we were both very tired. We went home... to the Tower, because it felt safer. <Xarroch> And then...? <Glossaria> We changed for bed, and he was... watching me change. I helped him settle himself, because I was very concerned that he might reopen the wound. And then I carefully got into bed with him, because I was feeling affectionate and wished to...::frowning:: cuddle him. But he wanted to do more than cuddle. ::she looks up at Xarroch:: Danger and sex, you remember? Apparently, his near experience with death had aroused him. <Glossaria> I demurred, and he argued, and... ::she shakes her head, the look of puzzlement on her face growing:: I'm not quite certain of the root cause, except for perhaps his innate dissatisfaction with me, but almost immediately we were screaming at each other. <Xarroch> But is that really so very different from what you want now? <Xarroch> When you start mixing arousal, and danger... moods and tempers will flare, I should think. ::grins:: I know something of temper... <Glossaria> ::slowly:: I think... I can recognize the source of his desire at that time by comparing it to my present desires, so in that respect, yes, the two situations are similar. <Glossaria> But... I believe... I'm sure the outcome was decided later, after the argument. We were both behaving rationally by then. * Glossaria blinks for a moment, frowning again, and cocking her head at Xarroch. <Glossaria> But why do you wish to discuss Vallel? I offered myself to you. I don't believe that you would harm me, and in fact, I think we could share great pleasure. ::sounding a trifle hurt:: Am I undesirable to you somehow? <Xarroch> ::considers Glossaria for a moment:: Undesirable? No... You are a lovely human, and your intelligence and your own uniqueness I have to admit add to your appeal. <Xarroch> However... I am concerned. Both for you and for the boy. There is .. or was.. something between you that is not resolved, yet. Are you here purely for research and pleasure? ::gives Glossaria a penetrating look:: <Glossaria> I... I... ::confusion passing over her face again:: Of course. <Xarroch> And even if you are... will this be something you regret later? ::shakes head:: Acting on something merely because you wish to, because it *consumes* you... that is not a good way to live. It is... ::sighs a little:: very empty. <Glossaria> Regret? ::she frowns deeper, as if she doesn't understand the question:: <Xarroch> ::nods:: Yes... regret. Perhaps you have not lived long enough to know regret, then. ::smiles a little:: I envy you, then. Sometimes beings do something. Something that seems right at the time. but later.. they realize it was a wrong thing. ::waves a hand:: Perhaps well intentioned, perhaps not, but when in the end you harm another, and wish you had not... that is a terrible thing. <Xarroch> ::narrows his eyes a little:: And you do not seem so sure as you claim, little Glossaria. I would not wish to be the cause for your learning regret. <Glossaria> ::frowning deeper:: I... believe I have experienced something similar, but... I... ::she sounds a little frightened:: Xarroch, I can't remember.... * Glossaria shakes her head and stands, suddenly. "I think I should go." <Xarroch> ::moves closer to Glossaria, going down on one knee to be a bit slower, and placing one hand on her arm, the other on her forehead, and begins chanting softly.. a cool white glow courses from his hands to cover Gloss for a moment, and he looks into her eyes:: That should help some.. with the fear. What can you not remember..? ::looks concerned:: <Glossaria> I... ::sits again:: <Xarroch> ::smiles a little, reassuringly, and offers her the tall glass of water, and staying where he is:: Go on... please. I *do* want to help, if I am able. <Glossaria> Just now, I couldn't recall what regret... *felt* like. I can recall having experienced emotions in the past, and very recently, but... ::frowning and putting a hand to her head again:: I feel as though I can experience emotions, or be rational, but not both at once. ::cocking her head to one side:: That's... typical for humans... isn't it? ::sounds as if she's trying to convince herself, taking the glass of water and drinking deeply:: <Xarroch> ::shakes his head:: I do not think so. ::grins a little:: It has been my experience that humans tend to mix their emotions and desires with their rationality, which is why they are so difficult to understand. <Xarroch> Is there perhaps... something bothering so much that you are trying to distance yourself from your emotions? ::tentatively:: Perhaps having to do with coming here like this, or to do with young Vallel? <Glossaria> Well... then... ::as if she's trying to sort it out and find an explanation as she speaks:: I do dislike... disorder. ::nodding agreement:: And yes, perhaps that's it, perhaps I wish to distance myself from my emotions. They do cloud one's judgement, and make it difficult to view things in a properly clinical manner... I... ::frowns:: Xarroch, do you dream? <Xarroch> ::chuckles, almost ruefully:: Properly harnessed they can be useful.. but I have experienced, and seen *far* too much of emotions clouding judgement... ::drifts for a moment, then looks up and nods:: Yes. I dream. <Glossaria> Have you ever experienced... erotic dreams? Fantasies? <Xarroch> ::raises and eyebrow and grins a little, nodding:: Yes.. I think any being capable of feeling arousal has such dreams. <Xarroch> ::looks straight at Glossaria:: And is this what you have had of me? These fantasies and dreams? <Glossaria> ::nods:: Nightly, since the Hall. And sometimes daydreams. And I... I know I experience such strong emotion when I have them, but... ::looking puzzled:: I don't feel that, right now. <Xarroch> ::chuckles a little, then composes himself:: So your earlier arousal has faded? <Glossaria> Well... ::thinks:: Yes, it appears to have, at the moment. But prior experience indicates that it will be return, and I still have intellectual desire for you... to know you. <Xarroch> ::looks thoughtful:: I wonder... * Xarroch stands and casts a spell at Glossaria, then studies her intently for a moment, and finally sits back down in the chair that skitters underneath him <Glossaria> ::eagerly:: You have an intellectual desire for me, too? ::looking puzzled, but holding still as Xarroch casts his spell:: <Xarroch> No... you are not enchanted... it seemed that may have been the case... <Xarroch> ::grins at Glossaria:: Intellectual desire? I suppose so, yes. As I said, you are a fascinating being. <Glossaria> ::cocking her head to one side and considering it:: I don't *feel* enchanted. Well, except for the original enchantment that gave me my current form, and the residue of my travel spell. ::indicating her shifting hair color, now a quite attractive shade of auburn flowing halfway down her back:: I feel perfectly normal. <Xarroch> ::grins wider:: Part of the point of a manipulation is to make you feel normal.. that you do is hardly proof either way, but I cannot detect anything. <Xarroch> Let me ask you something... do you feel if we did engage in carnal activities that your fantasies would ease? Are they a welcome thing, or something you wish to be rid of? <Glossaria> ::shakes her head:: I'm fully warded, and I've spent most of my time in the Tower. The likelihood of any form of manipulation under those circumstances is absurdly low. * Glossaria leans back in her chair, cocking her head and giving the matter some thought. <Xarroch> Perhaps... but a determined and powerful enough being can usually find a way to accomplish something. And there is no such thing as perfect wards or defenses.. there are always areas left open and relatively vulnerable. Still, I cannot disagree with you there. There seems to be nothing, and the chances are low of such magical manipulation. <Glossaria> They are not wholly unwelcome. ::smiling at Xarroch, with a spark in her eye again:: However, their frequency and strength has begun to interfere with my work. While there is a risk that I might develop some sort of...addiction to you, I believe such a possibility is low, and, in fact, upon fulfillment my desires would decrease to manageable levels. <Xarroch> ::laughs:: An addiction to me? That is not something I would have thought a danger. ::smiles:: <Glossaria> Folklore is a highly unreliable source, of course, but the demon lover tales do indicate a risk of that nature. There was, for example, the queen who has so dissatisfied with the performance of her king after having been seduced by a demon that she threw herself from a high window rather than share his bed. <Xarroch> Ahhh. I am not an Incubus to be able to form such a hold, so that danger as such would not exist... <Glossaria> ::nodding:: Precisely. <Xarroch> ::looks thoughtful for a moment:: Is your interest in me purely for the fantasy fulfillment? <Glossaria> ::shakes her head:: No. There is also the prospect of increasing my experience, so as to better relate with.. Vallel... ::tiny frown for a moment, which passes::, and curiosity. ::she cocks her head to one side:: I'm not certain why, at the moment, but I also believe that, because you are a friend, giving you enjoyment would make me happy, as well. <Xarroch> ::smiles:: You are a good person, Glossaria. <Xarroch> Let me make a suggestion, then... <Xarroch> Suppose that for now we do not engage in fulfilling your fantasies, but content ourselves with having this very interesting conversation. And I would further invite you to come again to speak with me about the things you are interested in, both of myself, and perhaps other things as well. ::looks around:: Now that I have a home it would be good to have a visitor from time to time. <Xarroch> If these fantasies continue to plague you, welcome or not, and to interfere in your life and your work, we shall look more into acting on them. <Glossaria> ::cocking her head to one side, and considering a long moment before nodding:: Very well. <Xarroch> Perhaps this chat, and others, will help you to deal with it, in coming to know me better as a fellow being, and not so much a mystery. <Xarroch> ::smiles just a little:: Sometimes a fantasy is better left as just that... but we shall know in time. And I do not plan on going anywhere soon. <Glossaria> Xarroch... ::in a small voice:: It's... it's not because you find me undesirable, right? Or because you love Meghan better? <Xarroch> ::meets Glossaria's eyes levelly:: No... I put you of because I do not wish to do anything too hastily. ::shakes his head:: I've done enough like that, and there are times for actions, and times for thought. You are a very desirable, attractive, and interesting creature in your own right. ::grins:: I may well have a fantasy or two about *you* now. ::places a hand over Glossaria's:: <Xarroch> You should not doubt yourself so much, little one. <Glossaria> I... ::sighing:: It's very... difficult sometimes not to. I know so much, but so little. I'm human, but not... ::shakes her head:: Thank you, Xarroch. This *has* been an educational discussion. ::impulsively hugging him:: <Xarroch> ::hugs Glossaria firmly but gently:: Perhaps we can share what we learn of these confusing human ways as we explore them, then? <Glossaria> ::nods:: I... I'd like that. Thank you, Xarroch. ::stepping back and taking a deep breath:: I'll go now. But... please... don't speak of this to Meghan? <Xarroch> ::smiles fondly down at Glossaria:: I think it would be interesting, as well. Do not worry, I shall keep what passes between us just between us. Although... ::looks around a bit:: It does seem you have others worried for you, or at least worried enough to keep track of you. There is at least one keeping track of you even now. ::grins:: <Glossaria> ::looking a trifle alarmed:: There is? <Xarroch> ::nods:: I believe only your Zoya for now. ::looks amused:: Or perhaps it is me she is worried about? <Glossaria> Zoya? Oh, no! I must be getting back. Oh, dear, she's going to be quite upset with me... I hope she's not watching, I... ::shakes her head:: I'll visit again, Xarroch, thank you, but I'd best be leaving now. <Xarroch> ::shakes his head:: I do not believe she has seen or heard our conversation, Glossaria, do not worry on that. <Glossaria> ::breathes a sigh of relief:: Still, I'd best go. Thank you again. * Xarroch snarls out several harsh syllables and gestures sharply a few times, tracing a portal in the air, which opens slowly, revealing the Tower not far away <Xarroch> And thank you, little one. Visit any time you wish. I do not sleep much. ::grins:: <Glossaria> ::smiles:: Thank you. Perhaps this will give my hair a chance to settle down. ::putting a hand to her now-plaid butch-cut hair:: ::cocking her head:: Neither do I, very soundly. ::smiling ruefully and waving as she steps through and disappears:: * Xarroch closes the portal and looks thoughtful, the chairs fading away and everything becoming more chaotic around him. |
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